Sunday, July 11, 2010

Wait for the Ding! or, The Day We Thought We Were Dead

When Husband and I have cause to travel by plane, we're usually headed all the way back east (or further) to visit my family. We rarely find ourselves on a flight shorter than five hours.

Three weeks ago: We're leaving North Carolina, a few thousand feet up in the sky on the first leg of our trip back to California. Husband is staring past me, out the window. And Husband? Looks agitated, like a dog before an earthquake. I glance up from my Economist, concerned.

"What's wrong, honey?" I asked, my voice still dripping with drawl after a week back home.

"We're descending really fast," he said, "It feels too early for that."

I peered out at the wing.

"Oh my gosh, we are!"

The passengers around us seemed blissfully ignorant of our imminent demise. I dropped my voice to a whisper so I wouldn't disturb them and continued, "Isn't it too soon? It is too soon.We're descending real fast."

Silently, we grasped hands as our dreams and plans for our entire life together crumbled. We gazed at each other, eyes full of fear and love and trepidation.

"Wait. Honey. This flight's only from Charlotte to Atlanta. We're just landing."

Ding!

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43 comments:

Midwestern Mama Holly said...

Ha Ha - I commend you. I would not have been that calm. Hell no. If Im going in a panic Im going to make sure the whole damn place is panicking with me........ Im a giver doncha know ;)

Jayne said...

But really though, isn't mass panic on an airplane just funnier? Or is that taking it too far for a laugh?

Amber said...

Hahahaha. I wish that were the closest I'd ever come to dying on a plane. I remember a particularly ridiculous flight where the plane was basically bucking and there was lightening outside my window. I was one gremlin-on-the-wing-of-the-plane away from dying a horrible Twilight Zone death.

Dancing Branflake said...

Oh dear! I would have freaked out! I feel such a lack of control that any bump sends shivers down my whole body. Yikes!

Whitney said...

Hahah, great ending.

Skywaitress said...

This seriously made me giggle. I'm glad you were just decending. Way to stay calm in the face of "danger".

Megan (Best of Fates) said...

Whew, I'm so glad you didn't die!

Though if you had, then blogged about it, that would have been pretty cool too.

Not that I want you to die.

Just sayin'.

DerekL said...

It's only three hours to Seattle, just sayin'.

Stephen Tremp said...

I have to admit panic on a plane is kinda funny. I shouldn't, but for some weird reason I like to see people loose their cool and freak out. Its a form of cheap entertainment Hollywood can't script.

Stephen Tremp

Wicked said...

I sort of enjoy watching people get all squirmy on planes. They are pretty much my happy place. Well, one of them. I like any area that makes the average person unhappy. Take me someplace where the sheep are happy and I feel that the world is on a path to destruction. I've said too much, haven't I? I will go now.

theTsaritsa said...

Haha! What a relief! Very funny story :)

I love short flights because I can't sit still for too long. During a long flight I'm always bugging the flight attendants to find out how much time has elapsed and how much sooner to landing.

Allie O'Bannon said...

I love this! I prefer to fly because I can't stand long car rides and get super fidgety and occasionally car sick... but I always have this grim sense of trepidation on flights.

I think it comes from watching Final Destination one too many times in high school.

janjan said...

Hi Margaret! Thanks for swinging by my blog and for the follow. I was reading your posts and it made me giggle, especially this one! I also hate flying. It gives me a lot of weird imaginations and I always have the feeling that the aircraft will fall off from the sky. Oh anyway, I was actually planning to write a post about my experiences on an airplane but I'm afraid people will laugh at me. So maybe next time when I have the courage haha!

qwithouttheu said...

Haha! I love this! I wish I could bottle that "Oh wait, I'm NOT dying" feeling and sell it. I'd make millions :)

WhisperingWriter said...

Ha, glad you were okay.

I hate flying.

WhisperingWriter said...

Regarding the note you left on my blog: yup, that's the museum!

SassyGirl said...

Hahaha, that would be terrifying if you weren't landing! But don't they usually have an announcement right before the descent? Strange.

Sadako said...

LOL, cute story. Very nice.

Kelley said...

That sounds like something I would do! It's funny that you were both thinking the same thing. Also, how awesome for you that you are married to John Cusack. Tell me I said hello.

Kelley said...

Ha! I have 2 brain cells! I meant tell HIM I said hello. I'm so embarrassed, especially since he's a celebrity and all...

Gnetch said...

Haha. I can imagine how relieved you were.

I feel such a loser that I've never traveled by plane. Ew, right?

kris said...

I hate flying.

But I love the feeling of not dying after totally expecting to die.

So I am torn.

Thomas said...

Wow. You are *remarkably* calm in the face of death. I'd hate to see what you'd do to someone trying to mug you on the street.

Seriously though, I admire your ability to fear for your life and not utter even a word of panic to your fellow passengers. Your husband, too!

Megan (Best of Fates) said...

I heard a ding this morning, then thought of you.

Oh yes, your power is stretching far and wide.

Holly Renee said...

Ba-hahahaha! I seriously got a little concerned reading this. It would have been hilarious had you two gotten a little louder about your concern. Glad you were just doing a regular landing though.

Lori @ In Pursuit of Martha Points said...

The only thing that keeps the plane in the air is me *willing* it to. I am convinced.

Also, flying anywhere around DFW is HORRIBLE because the plane has to change directions all over the place and banking turns scare the flip out of me.

Once planes are in the air, the should be flying in STRAIGHT LINES to where they need to go. It's not as if they're navigating around air cows or something.

I so need to be in charge.

soft nonsense said...

Story of my life.

Also, thanks for the follow, judging by the description of yourself above, I can tell we'll be good blog friends.

laurenne said...

An indirect flight! The horror. You're back in LA? We should meet one day.

Fragrant Liar said...

The good news is that nobody else on the plane was involved in your quiet little riot. They might have dumped you in Atlanta, where it. is. HOT.

jiawei said...

haha exciting! i like it.but if it was real , how to deal.....

2girlsonabench said...

Nice homage to Say Anything there at the end. Funny how so many parts of that film can apply to life ;)

Queen of the Rant said...

Tooo cute! Congrats on BON

California Girl said...

Blogs of Note and your title captured my eye. This post made me laugh. Now I want to find out what is still awesome in air travel because I can't think of a thing.

Lindsay said...

Too Funny! I hate being on planes, I would have panicked and yelled to everyone "We are going to crrrraaaasssssh"

TG said...

So cute and so lovely..
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Louie said...

Do you ever have flashbacks from being on the island? Are you sure you actually landed and that it wasn't a dream? For all you know you might be typing your blog from an underground bunker on an uncharted south pacific island and not even realize it!

Kelley said...

Did you karate chop that yelling teacher right in the wind pipe??

Henna @ AboutCabinets Blog said...

thats funny, you have created a perfectly hilarious situation and the expression in the photo match to the tilt - just loved the humor!! the picture is too good

lacochran's evil twin said...

Aw, I love Lloyd Dobler.

Diane Court: Nobody thinks it will work, do they?
Lloyd Dobler: No. You just described every great success story.

Michelle said...

Ah, too funny! Your blog post inspired me to write my own entry about flying (and my insatiable fear of).

http://streetviewblogger.blogspot.com/2010/07/holy-sht-my-fear-of-flying.html

noktour said...

The good news is that nobody else on the plane was involved in your quiet little riot.

janice said...

Funny in a nice way..

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PaintedDreams said...

"And no, I don't pluck these brows" HAHA you told them girl. Kudos! Im tottally followin you lmao